Find something you love doing....

....And you'll never work a day in your life.

I try and keep an open mind about possible options for my future. For years I have had my mind set on teaching whether it is early childhood, elementary or even special education settings. I am still on that track, but there are so many other possibilities, I just want to make sure I'm considering them all.

Almost every time I talk to my Dad, he always manages to slip in "options" for me. They're usually the same options: pediatrician, lawyer, psychologist "for kids" (he adds that last part to appeal to me more), or anything that requires a PhD or lots of schooling. If it's not suggestions, he always has some story about a teacher he met who is miserable and hates her job because she's poor and is stressed about her class. My Dad equates happiness to money. If I am making a lot of money, then there is no doubt I will be happy. Maybe he's just old school. Maybe I am young and naive. I know there's a lot I can do if I made a lot of money. However, I also feel strongly that if I am passionate and love doing my career, then I will always be happy.

So, sorry pops, I'm definitely not going to become a lawyer or a psychologist, but I am still thinking about other careers, summer jobs, and hobbies! I've always been really interested in baking and ever since I went to Europe I've been thinking about opening my own cafe because I loved them so much. I've also been thinking about going to another country, for a summer perhaps, to teach english. My neighbors are totally living the dream because they were abroad for a little and they came back and opened up Go Ape! I would love to open up some outdoorsy type business.

Well, whatever it may be, as I keep exploring my options, I just want it to be something where I can always give smiles and make people smile and encourage people to have a more positive lifestyle.

Love,

Melina Sabrina

Extraterrestrial

I feel...very different from a lot of people. I'm not trying to say "oh yea, I'm so unique and better than everyone else". You know those people that do everything in their power to just be different and you can tell they're trying so hard? No, this isn't what I'm talking about.

Sometimes I'm with a group of people and two things can happen: 1. They're talking about something really negative and I just tune it out. I can't really contribute to the conversation because I'm not feeling the energy or 2. They're talking about something I don't know too much about, but I'm so entranced by the conversation, I just want to listen and learn more. Ask questions here and there, but not too much so they don't lose their train of thought. I love listening to other's ideas.

This usually happens with people I don't know but am trying to get to know. Every once in a while I meet someone like me though. It's so refreshing to find these gems. As an introvert I do a lot of listening and I'm perfectly fine with it. However, I have a lot to say too. Two weeks ago I met two gems that really made a difference to me. THEY became the listeners. They understood the meaning of listening intently and then giving their opinion. I had a conversation with one of these gems about if we had to choose to be deaf or blind, what would we choose. We had different opinions on this, but still understood exactly where the other person was coming from. It's so hard to find people like this. People who don't want to argue, just respect and learn.

It reminded me of Justin Nozuka. I know I bring him up a lot, but hear me out. I don't even know him on a personal level and yet when I talk to him it's like we've been friends forever. The conversation flows so smoothly. No rushing or jumping topics.

These people are so extraterrestrial to me. It gives me hope that there are more people just like me.

Love,

Melina Sabrina

"Too much of something is not enough"

Today was a series of unhealthy choices that I actually do frequently. I would not call them habits.....just things frequently done.

#1. My mornings always start off really slow. You know how some people hate getting out of bed and it's just so hard for them? Well, it's not the I hate getting out of bed, I just really love being in bed. I could spend an hour in bed at least before I actually get out of bed. Sometimes I'm half asleep going in and out of sleep. Sometimes I'm wide awake, but reflecting and enjoying life. I purposely set my alarm a little earlier then usual sometimes just so I can do this. Yes, I will wake up earlier just so I can stay in bed longer.

#2. I was driving to school and decided to take the longer, scenic route. I was so enamored by the green fields and trees that I think I had my eyes off of the road too long. This usually happens which I see a field, trees, bodies of water, or stars. A little dangerous, but it's such a temptation to look!

#3. As I was driving and taking my time, this woman decides I'm driving too slow so she wants to pass me. Look, I was already going above the speed limit AND I was busy looking at something. How dare she decide to try and pass me. So I sped up which forced her to have to drive behind me again. I have a little case of road rage. This is actually something I want to change.

#4. I know every college student procrastinates and I am one of them. I can't help it if I would rather go to the diner with some friends or walk around campus then do homework. I know this is a dark and gloomy way of looking at things, but if I died tomorrow, I wouldn't want to spend my last day stressing over homework. Ya feel me?

So I just realized these four things all have to do with me taking my time. I'm just trying to live my life slowed down so I can enjoy everything.

Who knows what song the title is from? ;)

With all that said, I'm gonna sleep now, wake up early to do my homework.

Goodnight friends.

Love,

Melina Sabrina

Always remember to...

I had a wonderful weekend with wonderful people. Love & Dead Prez & MBSA. Sounds perfect right? It was until I came back to my room and start filling out my planner with everything I need to do. Same, old song: a lot to do and not enough time. Then I checked my mail and realized DOTS denied my second appeal...thieves. This is going to sound weird but, I wanted to go to the gym but my food wasn't digesting fast enough which was totally frustrating because my stomach needs to be almost empty for me to go. Amidst this anxiety I realized something was missing. Missing for two weeks now! Relaxation, meditation, reflection, time to myself. All of these things that I value so much and somehow they've slipped away for a little while. Instinctively I picked up my things and drove home. I'll admit it was a little late to drive home, but the consequences are worth it. Now I'm sitting in bed relaxing, meditating, reflectng and most importantly giving time to myself. It's not a lot of time, but if I'm going to get through this week I need this time.

I encourage you to make time for yourself doing something you love. I know we get so caught up in everything we have to do, but it is so hard to stay strong when you're not taking care of yourself.

Stay positive everyone! Appreciate every second you have.

Love,

Melina Sabrina

Confusion Illusion, You're blocking my sun

I went bowling last night and had a FANTASTIC TIME. It was like I was on a such a high having so much fun. So surreal like the fourth dimension was non existent. I usually draw myself back and shy away in big social scenes where I have to meet new people, but last night was different. I felt like a little butterfly. Alright, so I attribute some of it to the caramel macchiato I drank before going, but mostly, I feel it's because I was around my brothers and sisters. It's been so long since I have felt their company and encouragement. With my brothers and sisters, I know I have found THE REAL, THE TRUTH. Best feeling ever to have people who know THE REAL, THE TRUTH.

Afterwards, I stepped back to look at the bigger picture. I had a moment of confusion illusion. I found myself in an entanglement. For some reason, I felt like I needed to find the answer right away. I needed to know what was going to happen and what I needed to do. After a few hours of weighing pros and cons, making t-charts and venn diagrams, I realized I was wasting my time. Why did I need to know right away? I forgot I have to let go and let flow. Free my mind and experience life. Live your life slowed down. Enjoy the present you're given.

Then I had a CJAM night. A night of tired, fun. No sleep. Just foolishness. It was great. Jimmy can do 10 push ups with Christine standing on his back. Crazy, right?

If you walk with your soul and breathe in, you will win.